Marriage

Jain Community, though a miniscule minority in terms of strength of population, has not been immune to the greater ills afflicting the Indian Society in the sphere of marriage. The problem of dowry, exhibitionism, pressure on parents for competitive over-expenditure in marriages far exceeding the spending capability of the parents & family, consequent financial troubles leading to ruination of peace & prosperity, fear of a girl child & considering the child as a burden on the family, resultant declining girl-child ratio affecting the marriage prospects of young men & women in the marriageable age within the community, traditional way of selection of bride & groom by the parents without participation of the boy & girl & resultant post-marriage incompatibility leading to anxiety, tension & even separation in no of cases etc. were all prevalent in the community.

The issues were causing wide spread problems within the Jain families. Mr Shantilal Muttha who has always been alive to the social affecting the community & the country at large was particularly moved by these issue and identified this as primary areas of action by BJS. He was the person who came up with the pioneering & visionary twin ideas of mass marriage, & matrimonial meets, meticulously planned, crafted & launched both the initiatives within the community successfully overcoming age old practices, beliefs & psychological bottlenecks & resistance.

The concept of Mass–marriage gradually caught attention of other segments of the society & has turned into a national movement in this country. Similarly Parichay Sammelans are now widely accepted & eagerly awaited programs of BJS which is seen as an effective platform for cementing future matrimonial alliances. Through these intiatives, BJS under the visionary stewardship of Mr Muttha has succeeded in reorienting & reforming the existing social practices relating to marriage within the Jain community & beyond


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Marriage is that relation between man and woman in which the independence is equal, the dependence mutual, and the obligation reciprocal.

Marriage and career are probably the two most important decision points in a person’s life. Getting married to the right life partner & live it together in joy & sorrow through ups and downs of life through the most important & unique bondage is possible only if the crucial decision on the selection of the partner goes right.

Shri. Shantilalji Muttha, the founder of BJS, was a person who could perceive this criticality & importance through his practical understanding of social issues and problems experienced by the society, and especially the Jain community. He embarked upon this novel idea of pioneering & establishing of mass marriages as a respectable concept & social practice. This idea first conceptualized and implemented by BJS under his vision & leadership, gradually came to be accepted by all sections of society. The first mass marriage was held in 1985, & thereafter it is being held every year.

In olden days, the aged persons of the Community used to search suitable matches for their children in all communities, especially in Jain Community. In present scenario, even the parents do not have sufficient time for their children. The declining sex ratio, more girls getting educated as compared to boys and the preference of girls for boys settled in cities... these are the factors creating an imbalance in arranging marriages. Globalization, higher education and changing lifestyle has brought changes in attitude also.

A JOURNEY TOWARDS A HAPPY & HARMONIOUS MARRIED LIFE

Marriage is a union of two individuals, sacred in its philosophy of coming together, living together & growing together, till the final days of life through mutual sharing & caring for each other, extending far beyond the rituals & customs, in a carefully cultivated and nurtured environment of conjugal bliss & happiness.

Present day realities -

• Rapidly changing mindset towards marriage as an Institution
• Rapidly changing mindset towards marriage as an Institution
• Break down of Joint Family system, & growth of nuclear families
• Quest for increasing individual space & freedom
• Rising expectations in terms of economic independence, career aspirations, & power to make decision or participate in decision making
• Increasing availability of knowledge & information through information technology & media and its power to influence one’s thought & action

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BJS is very much aware of and alive to this problem, and has a mechanism in place to extend required assistance to the troubled individual / family in the form of counseling to enable them to analyze the problem, dissect its various aspects for proper Along side the several initiatives by BJS to reform the thoughts & practices on marriage & related issues in Jain Community as well as the larger society, many instances come up where an individual or a family facing a problem in this area is / are not able to come up with a solution & need assistance / guidance from external resources.

Understanding & come up with an appropriate solution by themselves.

Webster dictionary defines the word ‘Counseling’ as ‘advice & support that is given to people to help them deal with problems, make important decisions etc’BJS adheres to this concept of counseling by confining itself to the act of advice & support to enable the individual deal with the problem, and in no way takes part in a particular decision making. It acts through persons having expertise in counseling & has also developed a ‘BASIC FAMILY COUNSELING COURSE’ to equip the counselors on the various aspects of Family Counseling like Principles of Counseling, Mediating, Skills & techniques of Counseling, Qualities of a Good Counselor etc.

For further information or clarification, please send your query at marriage4ever@bjsindia.org